Graduation Address

"Reflections on Risk-Taking by Gloria Pierre" (October 1991). (UA Case 69, Box 3)

When I received the invitation to be with you today I immediately thought of my parents, wishing they could be here.

For my father in particular this would have been a very special occasion. He always treated my brother and me in exactly the same fashion, never assigning me to a woman’s role. Most unusual when you consider that he was in immigrant from Lebanon and had had begun at the age of eight to support the mother and the brothers. Even more unusual when you stop to realize that I’m talking about the thirties and the forties.

The lesson my father taught us have served me well: First, that we had a responsibility to both ourselves and society to develop and use our abilities to the fullest. Second, that if we wanted to do something and thought we could do it, then we should try to do it. "If you don’t succeed," he used to say, "you’re no worse off then before you tried and you’ve learned something in the process."

That is what I’d like to talk about today: risk-taking in the sense of being willing to take action on something you believe in or want to do even though you have no guarantee of success and may even face failure—as these terms are usually understood.

My father had lessons for that possibility too, life can be tough, he would say, but you learn from your difficulties and disappointments. And you must do your part, because God helps those who help themselves.

An important point this last one, essential for risk-taking. And I’ve heard a good story that illustrates it.

A very old and very religious man said to God one day, "I’ve been faithful to you all my life and have served you well. I’m very old now and can no longer do very much. I’ve never asked you for anything before but in my old age I want to ask a favour. God, let me win the lottery."

Months went by; two years passed. Finally, the old man said, "Lord, why have you not answered my prayers. It’s not that much that I asked for." And God replied: "Give me a break, buy a ticket."

But let’s look further at the notion of risk-taking and why so many of us are reluctant to accept that a full life involves taking risks.

When I was a student we were strongly influenced by the ancient maxim "Know thyself." We spent a great deal of time discussing how we would achieve both self-knowledge and self-development. We were told that we should never stop learning, about ourselves as much as other subjects, that the learning process goes on as much outside the classroom as in, and for the rest of our lives.

I’m sure you’ve all heard these same words. And while many people do continue learning, for too many others it stops in the classroom, I want to look at what I think happens to people and learning outside a formal setting.

It’s been said that too many young people have stopped learning in the religious or spiritual dimension of their lives long before they graduate university. Some also settle into rigid political and economic views by that time they are 25 or 30. By their mid-30s most will have stopped acquiring new skills or new attitudes in any central aspect of their lives. By middle age too many people are caught in a pattern of activity that they don’t really care about because they’re afraid to do anything else.

Sounds grim, doesn’t it? The sad part is that most people don’t realize what a rut they are in or what their capacity for growth is until some major event, good or bad forces a change in their life pattern.

Why is it that most people don’t keep learning, exploring, experimenting, developing their talents? I think it’s because they are not willing to risk failure.

Most of us have a great fear of failure. Worrying about failure extends to most aspects of people’s lives, not only to such obvious major decisions as changing jobs or floating new ideas. We’re paralyzed by the fear of making mistakes. We can’t bear to be criticized. We’re afraid of being rejected, whether it involves the writer’s article, the artist’s landscape or our relationships with people.

What’s the result? Most people never develop to their full potential. They reject change and growth because they prefer the security of the familiar and the approval of peers. Life for them may be comfortable and safe, but it’s also dull. And when life doesn’t go the way they expect, most of them have difficulty coping.

It’s sad to see how many people who have their health and no real financial needs, are asleep to the wonders of life. And to the joy of what can be reached for.

At the same time society loses the source of its talent and creativity. And the nation withers.

For example, we hear a great deal these days about the federal government’s productivity agenda, about the need to increase the country’s competitiveness, about globalization. We hear that today’s graduates—no doubt many of you here—will move from one field of work to another several times in their lifetime. In other words, people are going to have to risk change in the decades ahead.

But one wonders. Will we have the openness, the flexibility, the vision, the willingness to take the risks that our future will require of us? Remember that this is a society that doesn’t encourage imagination or innovation because they involve a risk of failure—and we’ve been conditioned to fear that.

What can we do to change ourselves and our society? We must begin with ourselves. And the tools of change are awareness and acceptance.

Awareness is the journey towards self-understanding implicit in the maxim "Know thyself." It’s an honest look at our fears and illusions, weaknesses and strengths. It’s admitting the extent to which we’ve been conditioned to do this or not do that. It is recognizing that when we try, we can do more then we realize.

As for acceptance, I’d like to share a quotation that defines this concept so well.

"In the game of cards called life, one plays the hand one is dealt to the best of one’s ability.

Those who insist on playing, not the hand they were given, but the one they insist they should have been deal—these are life’s failures.

We are not asked if we will play. That is no an option. Play we must. The option is how."

How will we play? If we accept the reality that we won’t always win in this life, we may be more willing to chance failure and the opportunity for growth it presents. We may discover that what we have been conditioned to think of as failure is not failure at all. When we don’t succeed at everything we do, we can realize that we have enriched our lives through the experience.

Those of you graduating are at the beginning of a new stage of your lives. This is why ceremonies like today’s are called commencements in many places. Whether you’re in your 20s, 30s, or 40s, whether you’re already working or staring a career, a new phase in your life is at hand. You have achieved the goal you set for your endeavours at UNB. You have succeeded in your studies. And not without difficulties—perhaps failures along the way—for many of you. I hope that this achievement encourages you to attempt what you believe in or want to do even if you think there’s a risk of failure. Have faith in yourself. Remember that too often, as Shakespeare observes, "Our doubts are traitors, and make us lose the good we oft might win by fearing to attempt."